Latest Unitarian Universalist Miracle

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

The way forward leads only to peace.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Don’t get me wrong, I’m wild about this place.
No buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love Earth.
Just a couple of buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love Jesus.
No buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love people.
Just some occasional buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my life.
No buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my religious community.
Just a few minor buts.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my self.
Just as I am.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my family.
Just – no, it doesn’t matter.
Don’t get me wrong, I love you.
Just – because you don’t do conditional love.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Hey, Judas, that’s no way to say goodbye.”

[Similar, perhaps, but not what He said to Judas in the garden.]

D. Blog: Unitarian Universalist Jokes

Q: Have you heard the latest UU miracle?
A: Someone saw the face of Ralph Waldo Emerson on a tortilla.
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Q: Why can't Unitarian Universalists sing very well in choirs?
A: Because they're always reading ahead to see if they agree with the next verse.
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Q: What do you get when you cross a Unitarian Universalist with a Jehovah's Witness?
A: Somebody who comes knocking at your door for no apparent reason.