How About Those Jesus Relics!?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Instead of trying to make the world in our image, we should try to live in peace with it.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Is there a heaven?
Well, you know, I think there is, but not in the traditional way.
I experienced some of it yesterday, I’m sure, because heaven really can’t wait.
Your dominion emerges from time to time in the interactions of your people, in moments of revelation, beauty, love and laughter.
Such moments, epiphanies some people call them, are beautiful, inspiring, truly divine.
Life in its fullness, in the goodness you establish. Heaven on Earth, no doubt about it.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“After I’m gone, relics from my life and death should become objects of worship worth incredible sums of money. Of course they will be fantasies and deceptions.”

[He threw this shekel across the Jordan River… No, He never said this.]

D. Blog: Bats in the Belfry

Getting Rid of the Bats

Three pastors were having lunch in a diner. One said, "You know, since summer started I've been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I’ve tried everything--noise, spray, cats--nothing seems to scare them away."

Another said, "Me too. I've got hundreds living in my belfry and in the attic. I've even had the place fumigated, and they won't go away."

The third said, "I baptized all mine, and made them members of the church. Haven't seen one back since!"

Let the Games Begin...

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Don’t look now, but peace is right above you.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Thank you, again.
I can’t say it often enough, really. I know of nothing that seems more appropriate in response to you than my gratitude.
Life is wonderful.
Earth is spectacular.
People are fascinating and creative and clever beyond reason.
Family and friends share the adventure with me.
Very little in this blessedness resulted from my doing, and I cannot believe it came about by chance, so I attribute it to you, and I see your presence in it all.
Thank you, again.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Yes, Judas, I guess you could say that Joseph invested in grain futures.”

[Joseph got something out of the deal with pharaoh, but Jesus never said this.]

D. Blog: Republicans (on the day following the indictment of Ted Stevens of Alaska)

It’s hard to recognize the party of Lincoln these days. No longer interested in preserving the union, it has systematically used fear and bullying to divide and dismantle, preferring to further line the pockets of the wealthy while taking from those of lesser wealth and power. The current batch of the breed follow precedents established in earlier administrations. Arrogance bred by ideological certitude locks out empathy and leads to abuses of power beyond even constitutional boundaries. Watergate, Iran-Contra, Abu Ghraib, Gitmo, Blackwater-gate, Justice-gate, Oil-gate, Alaska-gate – all clearly outside the bounds of law and decency and the interests of the American people as a whole.

Olympic Games may be a source of pride for some Americans, but games are merely distractions from the reality of the losses brought on in recent decades. I think Lincoln would be ashamed.

Mountain Glory

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

The logic of killing for peace escapes me…

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Breathtaking, wonder-full, word-defying – just a “typical” mountain view. Earth rises in her glory, reminds us of our humble and dependent place, and inspires us to flights of imagination and heights of attentiveness that invite/lead us to acknowledge your presence.

I pity those who seldom see mountains. How hard it must be, I imagine, for them to know you when their landscape is flat or dominated by human structures. How hard, too, for them to attain a realistic identity in relation to Earth and to you.

Let us look to the mountains…
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“I hear that someone has written something called '101 Sex Tricks to Try Before You Die.' 101!! - and I never even got to first base.”

[We all have to make sacrifices, but He never said this.]

D. Blog: Peace Prayer Haiku

It is no small thing
To pray for peace, when
All of life depends on it

Saying Thank You

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace is inevitable. Why fight it?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

You didn’t have to make an astonishing cosmos.
You didn’t have to make a diverse, beautiful, life-sustaining Earth.
You didn’t have to make humans capable of creativity, wisdom, sacrifice, compassion and love.
But you did.
It all says something about you.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“I saved the best for last.”

[It fits resurrection, not crucifixion, not “rapture” – but He never said it.]

D. Blog: On the gift of Financial Security

I admit it: having some financial security can allow for a fulfilling life. It can reduce the level of anxiety, as long as I don’t give in to the temptation to go too far beyond what is enough.

Because I attribute this security to blessing and the whims of the real estate market, I don’t think we’ve “earned” it, or that I can count on earning more than what is enough. This is enough, this is ample, this is a gift. I cannot count on more from our benefactor.

I know there are scenarios in which this “security” could be lost, yet I feel none of the tight-fisted resolve to hold on to what is “ours” or to what we have “earned”. The gift is ours to enjoy and to share – and to say “thank you” for it.

Promoting Paranoia

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace with our creator is impossible if we war with our neighbors.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Don’t fence you in? Okay.
Let you wrap your arms around me? Okay.
Group hug? Okay.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Going my way?”

[He never said it. Not in English anyway.]

D. Blog: Politics of Paranoia

Some people express alarm that a presidential candidate can draw huge crowds and inspire them with hope. Reminiscent of Hitler, they say. Excuse me?? Their paranoia is showing, I say. In fact, this reaction seems to me reminiscent of a former high priest in Jerusalem upon hearing about Jesus.
Some people seem afraid that a presidential candidate favors peaceful and cooperative relations with other countries, including some that pose an imagined threat. Appeasement, they say. I beg your pardon?? We reap what we sow, I say. Plant the idea of war and you get that kind of harvest.

Life Changers

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

When I became a pacifist, my whole life changed.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

A succession of happy, productive days.
Life is good. Yeah!
A worshipping community that is open, joyful and creative.
Life is good. Yeah!
A time of rest and renewal for what lies ahead.
Life is good. Yeah!
A collection of wonderful memories and friends.
Life is good. Yeah!
A family filled with love and laughter.
Life is good. Yeah!
I know Heaven coming on Earth.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Jerusalem’s a nice place to visit, but I wouldn’t want to live there.”

[Or die there. But He never said this.]

D. Blog: Sticky Bumpers

- I’d turn around if I were you!

- Change is inevitable. Growth is optional

- Slower minds keep right

- Free America

How Many in Oodles?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Home is where the peace is.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

As with all that is, the goal for us is to make the most of our potential. I like to think I’ve done pretty well in that regard. Given quite a lot, in global terms, I hope I have achieved much with what I have as potential. I like to think I have lived abundantly without over indulgence. I like to think I have served others, demonstrated compassion, and stayed relatively true to a relatively true sense of who you are. I also like to think that ni my remaining time on Earth, I will continue to do so. So help me, God.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Mom, what can I do about these zits?”

[He must have been a teenager, but He never said this.]

D. Blog: “Oodles” [From Evan Morris’ column at www.word-detective.com]

Whatever happened to “oodles”? Time was that “oodles” was a perfectly acceptable way to enumerate an abundance of all sorts of things (”Woolworths has oodles of Slinkys”), but the last time I tried to use it with our accountant in explaining our deductions, he seemed peeved at my use of the term. I blame the rise of computers and spreadsheets. While once we would be happy to gesture broadly and brag, “We have oodles of cats,” now people want to know precisely how many, down to the whisker. But there’s more to life than taking an endless inventory.

There seems to be a perverse principle at work in the English language that says that the more fun a word is to say, the less we know about it. “Oodles” is, at least to non-accountants, an entertaining word. What we find when we go looking for the origins of the “oodles” is a few dates and a lot of theories. But at least the theories are interesting and involve some similarly amusing words.

We do know that “oodles” first cropped up in print in English around 1867, meaning “a large or unlimited amount of something” (”All you lack’s the feathers, and we’ve got oodles of ‘em right here,” 1887). The Oxford English Dictionary suggests that “oodles” is a short form of “scadoodles,” US slang of the same period also meaning “a lot.” This leads to the logical suspicion that “scadoodles” is an elaboration on the word “scad,” more common in its plural “scads,” which was also common slang of the time meaning, you guessed it, “lots” (at first of money, later of anything). Unfortunately, we have no more idea of where “scad” came from than “oodles” or “scadoodles.”

Another theory, equally plausible, traces “oodles” to “boodle” or “caboodle,” one-half of the phrase “kit and caboodle,” meaning “all and everything” (”The Sheriff seized the house, the land, the dog, the whole kit and caboodle”). The “kit” in the phrase is 18th century English slang for “collection” or “necessary items” (as in a soldier’s “kit bag”). The “caboodle” harks back to the Dutch word “boedel,” meaning “property.” The phrase “kit and caboodle” also became popular in the mid-18th century, so the timing is right for “caboodle” to have been shortened to the simpler “oodles.”

My hunch is that all of these words, “oodles,” “scadoodles” and “caboodle,” are mutations of “boodle,” if for no other reason than the greater age of “boodle,” which was actually a legal term meaning “estate” a century earlier. There are also other dialectical elaborations on “boodle” floating around out there, especially in the American South, including “boocoodles,” a mix of “boocoo” (from the French “beaucoup,” meaning “much” or “plenty”) plus “oodles.”

Anonymity Be Praised!

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Put more fuel on the embers of peace.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

You fill me.
You fill the world.
You fill my life.
You fill every void.
You occupy every atom of the universe.
Yet some people can’t find you.
Fascinating.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“A red wine, Peter? Don’t you know it’s white wine with fish?”

[Hmm. Nope, He didn’t say this.]

D. Blog: In Praise of Anonymity

I can see that anonymity has some major benefits. Whoever points a finger of blame at or criticizes the anonymous makes a futile gesture. Anonymity carries no responsibility, no accountability, yet interestingly, “Anon.” is said to be the most-cited and celebrated writer ever. If you cannot be seen, those bent on destruction and power cannot single you out or take aim at you. The famous, in contrast, attract followers and detractors alike, much like dogs attract fleas or a carcass attracts maggots. Who needs any of that?

Divine Reply to Suffering?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Commit random acts of peace today.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Today is another unofficial thanksgiving day.
Like every other day.
No government decree required.
Thank you.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Sure, Peter, I’ll be your lifeline.”

[I guess He was, but He never said it like this.]

D. Blog: Early Death, Diseased but Happy Life

Our congregation had to deal with the death of a teenager whose life was a continuous medical tragedy. Despite their best efforts, the gods of medical science proved incapable of curing or saving her. It was, perhaps, a miracle that they kept her alive for 19 years. A greater miracle was that Amy and Lisa adopted her and loved her through the years so that she knew a measure of happiness and joy.

In the end, as throughout her life, we turned again to God and asked: “Why?” I imagine the part of the divine reply we don’t usually hear: “Shit happens. I’m sorry. We’ll deal with it together.”

Seeing Wonders

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Can we know love if we don’t know peace?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

You give us life.
You give us love.
You give us hope.
You give us peace.
You give us purpose.
When living brings pain, we, like the unruly and ungrateful children we are, reject you and the value of your gifts.
Then you offer forgiveness.
You are ready to embrace us.
God, you’re amazing!
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Beans for supper, and now around this campfire, Matthew, I think you should call your story ‘Blazing Sandals.’”

[I’m sure He had a sense of humor, but also sure He never said this.]

D. Blog: A Haiku

Some don’t see the wonder
For the mundane routines of
Day to day life

Jesus Told Jokes?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Although I feel sorrow, fear and rage, they don’t lead me to war; they lead me to pray.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

When a flag becomes an idol, we have forgotten you.
When a nation becomes the object of our worship, we have abandoned you.
When we impose this new religion on the young, we have defied you.
When we spend more time seeking entertainment than seeking you, we have lost our bearings.
When we realize the horror we commit, we turn back to you.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Tell me, Mom, when this school form asks for my father’s name, what should I write?”

[Tricky question, but He never asked it.]

D. Blog: Christian Entertainment

For entertainment that offers good songs, good humor, good stories about life and faith, and new perspectives on Jesus, try Ed Kilbourne. He appeals to all ages and involves his audience in fun ways. Doubters and believers alike appreciate how he tweaks at us church goers and our ways. His faith is infectious because there is nothing canned about it, just the result of honest living and questioning. Attend one of his performances and you might even hear him tell Jesus’ favorite joke – if you’re good.

Suffering from Consumption

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

How can a bellicose nation find peace?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Make our ways your ways.
Make our will your will.
Make our days your days.
Make our lives your lives.
For your glory and our neighbors’ good.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Isn’t it great that we can show forbearance to the money-changers in the temple courtyard?”

[Not the way the story went, so NO HE DID NOT SAY THAT!]

D. Blog: Wilderness of Excess

We have too much. It might not seem like it in this society, but we do. Too much space in many of our houses. Too much stuff filling our rooms, walls, closets and storage facilities. Too much food for many of us. Too many things, activities, destinations, organizations, churches, entertainment options from which to choose. Too much “news”, politics and political commentary from too many people who would be better off finding productive employment instead of puffing themselves up because they have an audience.

We lack purpose and power to correct and combat our excess. We lack honest pride, not the posturing and boastful kind, but the humble pride of self-confidence. There are no prophets in these days who can face the skeptical, critical, cynical attacks of those Amos called cows (and bulls) of Bashan in his age, who might be called the bloated bulls of Wall Street and media conglomerates in our age.

Is there a voice crying out in this wilderness of excess?

Isn't That Interesting...

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

The heavenly hosts, suns and planets, all live in peace. Their lives seem to go on forever. Isn’t that interesting?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Life is good, yeah!
Life is blessing, yeah!
Life is privilege, yeah!
Life is luxury, yeah!
Life is incredible, yeah!
Life I awesome, yeah!
You are even more so, yeah!!
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Making money off the pilgrims in the temple? Nothing wrong with that, is there Judas?”

[I guess He never heard of Christian tour groups, so He never said this.]

D. Blog: Bumpersticker Favorites

- DARE to think for yourself

- Honk if you think I’m Jesus

- Don’t assume I share your prejudices

- We can’t cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy. – Joseph Campbell

Macaroni, Anyone?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Try peace. You’ll like it.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

I know you could have made things different. I wish some things were different, but I’m sure you make the best choices and that we’re all caught up in our own choices, too. I enjoy my life and what I came through to reach this place and time of life, so for me I cannot complain. I do see and to a degree know the pain and suffering of others, however, and that’s where I wish things were different, that our histories and systems and beliefs did not cause such suffering and damage in the way you made things. Still, life is wonderful!
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Give me five!”

[Loaves, perhaps? No, He didn’t say it.]


D. Blog: Macaroni [from the Online Etymology Dictionary]

“macaroni”

1599, from southern It. dialect maccaroni (It. maccheroni), pl. of *maccarone, possibly from maccare "bruise, batter, crush," of unknown origin, or from late Gk. makaria "food made from barley." Used after c.1764 to mean "fop, dandy" (the "Yankee Doodle" reference) because it was an exotic dish at a time when certain young men who had traveled the continent were affecting Fr. and It. fashions and accents. There is said to have been a Macaroni Club in Britain, which was the immediate source of the term.

How Many "Masters" Do You Serve?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

If victory could bring peace, why don’t we have it?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Sun “rising” or Earth rotating, it’s a marvel either way we think of it. Our senses tell us one, our minds the other.

That we know the how does not diminish our awe or our need for it to happen. So, too, with your love.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Well, I suppose you could serve two masters, if one of them is the Roman imperial army. That would never conflict with serving the Almighty.”

[No way He said this, so I don’t know why so many Christians act as if He did.]

D. Blog: Marking Our Way

We age. We mark birthdays, anniversaries, major events in our lives, retirement. They matter to us as milestones on our path in our earthly life.

What about our spiritual lives? We speak of “conversion,” “confirmation,” “baptism”, “new life.” But do we observe the anniversaries of these transitions in the walk with God? Wouldn’t that be a great tradition? How can we start it?

Bright Light or Dim Bulb?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

If not for the hope of peace, eat, drink and be merry while the rest of the world goes to pot.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

If I continue to replay my brief moment of praise for a recent episode of achievement, how must others of greater achievement deal with their pride?

I should return to Earth soon, for I don’t anticipate further adulation. I can happily retire into the woodwork.

Then I wonder: do you entertain a sense of pride of accomplishment? I would find that perfectly understandable – and natural even for one so supernatural.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“I liked playing Hide and Seek when I was a child, especially that ‘all ye, all ye, action, all in free!” part.”

[No video games for Him, so He might have played something like it. No English, though.]

D. Blog: Moving On

My old church and I broke up because of irreconcilable differences. She grew one direction, I another. She used to excite me, make me happy in our relationship, gave me pride and joy to be in her company. It’s sad that she seems to have lost her bearings and given in the voices of fear and paranoia. Sad, too, that she tries to live in the past, having decided the future is too uncertain.

My old church barely noticed when I left; she was too busy trying to appeal to others who share her fears. It’s sad, for sure. I’m happy to have found a church of hope and openness as it looks to the future and looks to share that hope with its neighbors.

My image for all this is that my new church is a bright light, my old church a dim bulb.

Military Obscenity

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace has its moments. Now, for instance.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Do you want us to be “spiritual”?
In-spirited beings in the world, bringing your spirit into birth on Earth?
We don’t seem to be doing very well with that program.
Your will be done.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Just say no – to sex.”

[After thorough examination of the evidence, I can’t find that He ever said this.]

D. Blog: A Haiku

The military gets how much?!
Sounds excessive
No, more like obscene

Last Supper Un-quote

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Did I miss something? I thought Jesus’ coming was about peace on Earth, not Christians going to war on and with Earth.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

I see beauty.
Therefore I am.
I see beauty.
Therefore I believe.
I see beauty.
Therefore I have hope.
I see beauty.
Therefore I love.
I see beauty.
Therefore, you are.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“I can drink you all under the table.”

[No, that wasn’t part of the conversation at the Last Supper.]

D. Blog: Friends

I’ve seen a good number of old and new friends in the past week. They remind me that friends add depth and breadth to our lives. Friends connect us to our former selves and the memories we’ve shared. Even new friends pull some of those memories from us, as they want to know what experiences have brought us to where we are in the present. Friends expand our experience of life by sharing what is meaningful to them. In doing so, they expose us to different views, but in ways that make them easier to understand and to accept.

On the whole, I prefer a friend-friendly world over a user-friendly world.

Another Day, Another...

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace is attainable – for a price. Practice democracy on an international level. Give up the lust for wealth, luxury and power. Share the toys and pass the plates around the table. Can we do that?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

I know that we face monumental problems in the world.
Yet, it’s a wonderful planet.
I know that people and groups can commit despicable atrocities.
Yet, people also carry out amazing acts of compassion.
I know that the violence of human and natural forces destroys too many lives.
Yet, natural and human creativity inspires our lives with the beauty it produces.
Thus, on balance, I agree with Ted: Life is good! Yeah!
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“That John is a real hunk.”

[The disciple He loved, perhaps, but He never said this.]

D. Blog: Another Day, Another…

Another day, another…? Dollar!*(&}!@
Is that all that occurs to us?
How about…
- another day of learning?
- another day of wonders?
- another day of beauty?
- another set of opportunities?
- another expression of love?
- another chance to experience joy?
- another day to show compassion?
- another day to enter the process of creation?
“Another dollar” trivializes life’s marvels.

Did He Say "Going Up?"

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace: both now and not yet. Live it boldly.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

I won’t say your daily blessings are boring, but finding new ways to recount them is a challenge. Yesterday – terrific! This morning – off to a magnificent start! This afternoon – anticipated with great expectations! Tomorrow – a celebration in store!

And so on. Blessing upon blessing, day after day. You bring goodness to life.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Going up?”

[No, that would be the elevator operator, not Jesus.]

D. Blog: Wisdom on the Road

- Strength and wisdom are not opposing values – Bill Clinton

- I embarrass my offspring

- Our factories are all overseas. All we produce here are rich executives

- The arts are not a luxury

What Color is Your Neck?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

What is the down-side to peace?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

We are vulnerable beings who need your support.
Thank you for supplying the means to support our fragile bodies
Thank you for providing the stability and imagination to sustain our weak minds.
Thank you for sending love and compassion to undergird our volatile psyches.
Thank you for offering us what we need to develop our lasting souls.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Beggars can’t be choosers – I’m the Messiah.”

[No we can’t; No, He didn’t say it.]

D. Blog: Think You Know Redneck?

[From the Online Etymology Dictionary]

“cracker” - 1893; attested 1830 in more specialized sense ("This may be ascribed to the Red Necks, a name bestowed upon the Presbyterians in Fayetteville," from Ann Royall, "Southern Tour I," p.148). According to various theories, red perhaps from anger, or from pellagra, but most likely from mule farmers' outdoor labor in the sun, wearing a shirt and straw hat, with the neck exposed.

[And, from Wikipedia]

The National Covenant and The Solemn League of Covenant (a.k.a. Covenanters) signed documents stating that Scotland desired a Presbyterian Church government, and rejected the Church of England as their official church (no Anglican congregation was ever accepted as the official church in Scotland). What the Covenanters rejected was episcopacy — rule by bishops — the preferred form of church government in England. Many of the Covenanters signed these documents using their own blood, and many in the movement began wearing red pieces of cloth around their neck to signify their position to the public. They were referred to as rednecks. Large numbers of these Scottish Presbyterians migrated from their lowland Scottish home to Ulster (the northern province of Ireland and soon settled in considerable numbers in North America throughout the 18th century. Some emigrated directly from Scotland to the American colonies in the late 18th and early 19th-centuries as a result of the Lowland Clearances. This etymological theory holds that since many Scots-Irish Americans and Scottish Americans who settled in Appalachia and the South were Presbyterian, the term was bestowed upon them and their descendants.

Possible American etymologies

Another possible source of the term redneck comes from The West Virginia Coal Miners March or the Battle of Blair Mountain, when coal miners wore red bandanas around their necks to identify themselves as seeking the opportunity to unionize. Another popular but unlikely etymology says that the term derives from such individuals having a red neck caused by working outdoors in the sunlight over the course of their lifetime. Similarly, some historians claim that the term redneck originated in 17th century Virginia, because fair-skinned unfree labourers were sunburnt while tending plantation crops.

Another popular etymology is that the term was originally used by African Americans as a pejorative for white people in general, in the same manner that peckerwood and ofay were coined by blacks.
It is clear that by the post-Reconstruction era (after the departure of Federal troops from the American South in 1874-1878), the term had worked its way into popular usage. Several blackface minstrel shows used the word in a derogatory manner, comparing slave life over that of the poor rural whites. This may have much to do with the social, political and economic struggle between Populists, the Redeemers and Republican Carpetbaggers of the post-Civil War South and Appalachia, where the new middle class of the South (professionals, bankers, industrialists) displaced the pre-war planter class as the leaders of the Southern states. The Populist movement, with its message of economic equality, represented a threat to the status quo. The use of a derogative term, such as redneck to belittle the working class, would have assisted in the gradual disenfranchisement of most of the Southern lower class, both black and white, which occurred by 1910.

Sense and Nonsense

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

“Did e’er such love and sorrow meet?” – As when young people head off to war?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Another day, another batch of bad news from around the world – like extending the “war” in Iraq.
Another day, another series of personal joys to reflect upon – like long walks in nearby parks.
Another day, another set of things to ponder – like the spider that senses my presence and flees its web to hide in the leaves of a tree.
Another day, another gallery of natural and human artistry to view with wonder.
Another day, another chance to try to decide: how amazing is this life?
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“You guys will love the house where Lazarus lives with his two sisters; it has great curb appeal.”

[No curbs, no curb appeal, no quote by Him, verily.]

D. Blog: If Jesus Comes

If real and lasting peace comes to the “Middle East” then perhaps Jesus will really come again. That scenario makes much more sense to me than His coming with an apocalypse that would be totally out of character for him and a denial of His true self – and would wipe out the “Holy Land.” I vote for sense over nonsense.

What's Cooking Inside You?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Jesus said “Follow me,” so I became a pacifist.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Satisfied with your abundance, what need have I for striving?
Satisfied with your abundant love and forgiveness, what need have I for worldly success?
Satisfied with Earth’s abundant beauty, why should I care for fashion, fame or fortune?
Satisfied with abundant life from you, what fear can death hold over me?
Satisfied, I enter your embrace.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Yeah, that “turn the other cheek” thing was a sort of trial balloon. Came down to earth quickly, didn’t it?”

[No, it took more than 300 years to fall into widespread disuse. So no, He never said it.]

D. Blog: Stirring Emotions

So many emotions can stir in so brief a time. From gladness, to humor, to irritation, to obligation, to serenity, to warmth, to sympathy, to anticipation, to mild anxiety, to gratitude, to peace, to joy. All of that at least in about 15 minutes. Most of the time I don’t pay attention to those inner stirrings; I simply move from one chore or activity to the next, unaware that how I carry out these acts is determined in part by those undercurrents within me. I imagine I might experience a sort of paralysis if I noted all that moves within me, so I do not want that much awareness.

However, I do hope for enough awareness to know when what stirs in me comes from God, when the divine Spirit begins to boil.

New Babel: Attack Iran

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

In the realm of God, peace is a given. If you don’t live in peace, you don’t live in God’s dominion.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

“I don’t know why I love you like I do. I don’t know why, I just do.”
Well-known song, but I’d never sing it to you.
“You made me love you. I didn’t wanna do it.”
I wouldn’t sing this one, either. Its meaning is a bit unclear. You didn’t twist my arm, so that sense of the words does not apply. However, you do offer so much that attracts and appeals that I can hardly resist your charms.
“I wanna hold your hand” is the tune that then resonates with what I feel with you.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Mom, tell them I want to be an organ donor.”

[Not an 8th word from the cross, no. But perhaps a symbolic interpretation of communion/mass?]

D. Blog: Attack on Iran???

Some military and policy geeks seem to think we must get ready for the next war. They consider that “realism” and an extension of the “necessity” for “pre-emptive war.” Let’s get real! It’s actually self-fulfilling and self-defeating prophecy at best. At worst it’s the military-industrial complex at work beginning to articulate the propaganda to convince the American people we need to protect ourselves from the speck in our neighbor’s eye. Realism would be to prepare ourselves for peace.

Where is God?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

If business could see the profit in it, we might have peace.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Earth reveals your glory!
Do we pay attention?
Earth reveals your glory!
Does it cause us to wonder?
Earth reveals your glory!
Do we admire and cherish it?
Earth reveals your glory!
Do our hearts echo its praise and thanks to you?
Earth reveals your glory!
Do our lives reflect the joy in it?
Earth reveals your glory!
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“If you ask God for some Stones, will God give you some Beatles?”

[I know which I like better, but you can bank on the fact that He never said this.]

D. Blog: Where Is God?

A couple had two little boys who were always getting into trouble. Their parents knew that if any mischief occurred in their village, their sons were probably involved. The boys' mother heard that an elder in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her sons. The elder agreed, but asked to see them separately.

So, the mother sent her youngest son first, early the next day. The elder, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?" The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response. So the elder repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God!!?" Again the wide-eyed boy made no attempt to answer. When the elder raised his voice again to bellow "WHERE IS GOD!?" the boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into a closet, slamming the door behind him.

When his older brother found him in that hiding place, he asked, "What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We’re in BIG trouble this time. God is missing, and they think WE did it!"…

I agree with the Canadian novelist, Robertson Davies, who wrote that “The love of truth lies at the root of much humour.” One truth behind that joke is that it’s usually not children who hide or lose God…

Can You Read the Handwriting?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Without humans, the meek will inherit Earth.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

We don’t know why you love us like you do.
We don’t know why, you just do.
And that’s the way it is, July 6, 2008
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Give me five!”

[Loaves, perhaps. No, He didn’t say it.]

D. Blog: “Independence Day?”

I feel the ominous weight of empire, how it sucks life from me and those around me, how it robs its citizens of their intelligence and their creativity in order to serve its interests. Those interests seldom coincide with divine interests. Empire seeks domination. Divinity seeks only abundant life for all people. We have believed the lie that says we live in freedom, when in reality we live as indentured servants to this-worldly powers and principalities.

Do we see handwriting on the wall?

Preach It, Bumpers!!

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

My government: disturber of the peace.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen.
You know.
Nobody knows the pain in my life.
You know.
Nobody knows the despair that attacks me.
You know.
Nobody knows the heartbreak I feel.
You know.
Nobody knows the satisfaction that warms me.
You know.
Nobody knows the love that comforts my soul.
You know.
Nobody knows the joy that floods over me.
You know.
Nobody knows the peace that rains upon my heart.
You know.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“When this is over, I think I’ll hole up for a few days.”

[I wish the gospel writers had made it an 8th word from the cross, but no, He didn’t say it.]

D. Blog: Bumper Homilies

- Better a bleeding heart than none at all

- Ignore your rights and they’ll go away

- It is no measure of good health to be well adjusted to a sick society

- Buckle up. It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car

Until He Comes

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

We want freedom so much that we will sacrifice peace for it. Does it work?

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

I hope you get to appreciate the beauty of your garden, Earth, at least as much as I do. When the sun shines on and through the multi-greened leaves, my spirit fills with wonder and joy. When rain falls in a gentle mist to rinse the grasses and flowers and find welcome in the soil, I can only marvel at how such a life-sustaining system could develop. It’s all an incredible illustration of chaos theory, don’t you think?
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“You made me love you; I didn’t wanna do it.”

[It wasn’t my big blue eyes that did it. And He never said it.]

D. Blog: Until He Comes?

I wasn’t able to get a picture of the church sign that read: “Loving Jesus Until He Comes”

Not one of those changeable letters kind of signs, this one is painted beneath the church name and apparently a declaration of identify for the congregation. I love the multiple possible ways of interpreting the meaning and implications of that wording.

Just until He comes, but no longer?
He hasn’t come yet? To them?
They don’t love God or their neighbors because they love Jesus?
Doesn’t it have the potential for a sexual image coming to mind?
Some minds, anyway…

Anti-Christ: Nuclear War

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

Peace is the seedbed of hopes.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Old friends say we look happy.
We are. Who wouldn’t be? We have more than we need.
Old friends say we look relaxed.
We are. Who wouldn’t be? Each day feels like a vacation, even when we’re “working.”
Old friends ask how we like living here.
We laugh. What’s not to like? Then we babble on, trying to describe the things we love about our area.
New friends know what it’s like to live in this Eden.
Each day we thank you again.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Take up your king-sized bed and walk.”

[They were smaller back then, but He never said this.]

D. Blog: The Anti-Life Movement

Some so-called Christians, even among politicians, believe nuclear destruction could fulfill some sort of divine plan, based on stupid interpretations of biblical literature. The rest of us should shout them down.

Accepting nuclear annihilation defies reason, defies hope, defies life (this view is totally illogical when combined with a “pro-life” position, as it usually is) and defies God far more than eating the forbidden fruit could have.

I cannot imagine a greater sin than attributing this horrifying possibility to God. I can only call it demon possession, or a temptation akin to Jesus’ temptation to throw himself from the pinnacle of the temple because, said the devil, God would protect Him. He resisted that temptation, but some of his misled followers are prepared to take that leap of faith upon Satan’s assurances. I can’t believe they’ll be spared in that blasphemy.

Michelle or Cindy?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

My government can’t deliver on its promise, so I rely on God for any hope of peace.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

“No Fear” (a popular decal)
Not at all original.

“Though I should walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil.” (Psalm 23)
“Fear not.” (Angels at the birth of Jesus)
“Fear not.” (Jesus – multiple times)

Fear not, for you are near.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“Just gimme some kinda sign, girl, that you love me.”

[Not what He said before the woman washed His feet and dried them with her hair. And I suppose He doesn’t say it to any of us???]

D. Blog: Candidates’ Wives/Husbands

When I vote for a candidate, does it matter what I think of his or her spouse? Given the “news” media current fixation on Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain, you’d think one of them will be in line for the presidency if she qualifies to redecorate the White House. How did the country manage when there were unmarried or widowed presidents? I’ve seen something similar in pastors’ spouses who object to the expectations put on them for being married to a preacher.

It gives me a better understanding of an unmarried priesthood or a bachelor Christ. Let’s keep the focus on the ones on whom we place a mantle of authority.

Who Holds Title to Earth?

A. Unabashed Pacifist:

I’m going to peace in a handbasket.

B. Unabashed Christian:

Holy One,

Earth is yours.
We are on your private property, not exactly trespassers – you did put us here – but our presence on Earth does not give us rights of ownership.
Earth is yours.
When we abuse your beautiful place, we might find our stay here far less pleasant.
Earth is yours.
When we try to turn it to our selfish purposes rather than to your creative genius, then Earth becomes less fruitful and more ugly.
Earth is yours.
We must treat it with care lest it become ever less hospitable a place.
Amen

C. Un-quoting Jesus:

“I don’t think you really want to sell me a life insurance policy at this point, Nathaniel.”

[Life insurance, hmmm. No, He already had coverage, so He never said this.]

D. Blog: A Haiku

Birds don’t miss out on mornings.
Concerts begin at dawn.
Arise and sing!